Monday, February 12, 2007

"I believe God wants you to learn something from this whole thing" - A close friend

Its been a tumultuous month of absence from my blog...

FYP's getting the last minute jitters.

Too much of an emotional roller coaster...

The "new" car's doing great... ownership takes on a new meaning when your wallet's burning.

Feel vulnerable. Manipulated. Taken for a ride. Too many love songs. Too much rose tinting on my rather damaged glasses. As it is, the rose layer is peeling and cracking. Like a shattering mirror. And the world is blunt, jagged and contorted.

Why? Because I had strayed from God's ways and wisdom. God was nowhere in the picture.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord." - Isaiah 55:8

How this truth keeps resonating in me now. How painfully I've made myself aware of it. That I went against and grieved the Holy Spirit. That I had failed to stand up when the situation came.

I am ashamed to face God.

I ignored even sound advice from different figures in my life. And church and Christian friends who meant well. But thank God for these people whom He has put in my life, because they've been there for me always.

"For thy name's sake, O Lord, pardon mine iniquity; for it is great." - Psalm 25:11

Can't keep trying to stand on my own anymore. I'm so tired. Should never have strayed.

But what happens now? Oh God I pray, lead me back onto You, and never let me go. Your not-so-prodigal son is in need of Your mercy and grace.

I want to live for Your sake. Cause its the only thing that's worth living for.

Thank God for His mercies, grace and blessings. In Jesus's name.


1 comment:

Asha said...

Well said.